The alarm clock rings again; we are all awake even though it is only “zero-dark-thirty.” One more hug, one more kiss, one more good-bye. The door closes, the headlights move across the curtains, and a soldier drives away.
I hate this part. The part where I am left with two tearful kids who really want their daddy and really don’t want to go to school today. But they must, and I have to go to the dentist (to add insult to injury).
SSG OPSEC is off for 9 months in DC. I am calling it a “pseudo-deployment” because we get none of the perks of him being downrange (which is fair because he’s not downrange, he’s relatively safe in DC) but...he’s still gone.
I’m sad about this. Painfully sad. My heart aches at the thought of nine months of an empty bed, of hugs only from my precious children who I love very much but are not my husband.
I wonder what kind of disaster will strike while he is gone. (My mom says I am not to worry like this, but every Army wife KNOWS that things only happen when the guys are gone. We KNOW. It HAPPENS. It’s the Army Wife Corollary to Murphy’s Law.)
This week I will probably not even be able to sleep properly--it’s how it always happens. The kids will act out, everyone will be more grumpy than usual, I will lose my keys and my wallet every day instead of just once during the week, but then we will get in the groove and things will smooth out. It’s kind of like crochet.
When I’m teaching ladies to crochet, we begin with the chain stitch and then have to work into the beginning chain. The first row is always the hardest, and beginners have a hard time learning to deal with the stitches. The yarn slips, the loops change size, it’s easy to pull on the wrong tiny bits of yarn. Everyone gets frustrated at this point, but I try to reassure them, “Don’t worry, everybody hates the first row.” (I still hate the first row, even after years of crocheting.) During lessons, when someone finishes their very first “first row,” everyone stops and claps for them. It’s much easier to work into this first row of real stitches than to work into the chain because the rhythm and the pattern is established.
(Sound familiar?)
This first week is going to be tough, no two ways about it, because we are treading on unfamiliar territory. But once we come to the end we will have our rhythms and patterns established, and the rest will be easier.
Everybody clap for me next week, okay?
